The Chaos & Order Of Romance & Love

I believe that I may be one of many rare cases who’ll never truly come to comprehend what romance is and nor do I feel the necessity to enhance any growth towards this. I highly believe that I was born with the inability to not feel the true value of this ‘beauty’ which people call it so and so. Afore my primordial instinct being still sprung towards action back and forth, my inner senses have it under control. It’s mere alchemy of my conscious and unconscious parables that control, regulate, and flow this state of mind from its microcosmic brethren. For the longest, I’ve suffered from this frequent interaction, but it becomes clearer day by day that it is indeed my own illusion that has produced this new reality of mazes and labyrinths governed by strings of ethereal and stagnant relations.

During my recent study of spirituality and philosophy, I came under lots of incidences where renowned philosophers and polymaths suffered from almost the same disease that I’m currently suffering from. Some had actual celibacy, while others were naturally tainted by its pre-determined presence- in other words, asexuality. They may have considered themselves to be not efficacious at all, but I wouldn’t go as far as to conclude that- not that I consider myself to be efficacious nor will I ever be able to accomplish such a feat. Their minds and consciousness were constantly governed by strings of curiosity and ponder; thus, the nihilistic appearance of an inseparable deity had scrutinized their dreams and invaded their gardens of Eden. It’s not my implication that they were exploited by a radical, or normalized belief system, or fundamental value, but their synonymous appearances may have had a huge worldwide phenomenon in the coming of the eradication of an illusory subconsciousness. That’s of course, not to abandon the value of what already remained of religious values, but it already had inspired an ideology, which remained absent of the idea of a literary form of love- again, it’s not to imply that platonic love hasn’t existed before, but in the modern age, it’s a lot more common to find romantic relationships than platonic ones; that said, the idea of platonic relationship has been slowly coming to light in the recent decade or so forth. The idea that a love or relationship may exist within a logical structure sounds sound enough, but what we’re forgetting is that the amount of unconscious that’s being hidden from the front stage is still truly another road of mystery left for the unveiling of yet another wonderful structure of machinery. May it be romance or love without any desires, the unconscious part is what regulates and stimulates our being of forthcoming feelings and the further unexplored leave a hole for more mystic and perhaps, more phenomenal discoveries for the coming ages.

It’s probably in my best comprehension, that the love that’s formed within a romantic relationship doesn’t really come from a core being of a human. It’s executed in a way which symbolizes the Earth being engulfed in the Sun’s way since its time has come to become red giant- it’s probably not the best analogy, but try to get a good picture of what I tried to depict, it’s really just a conditional reminisce of fantasies being put forth by an unconscious desire, followed by the order of chaos. It’s quite blatant that in forming desires, we eventually form the determination for a chaos to occur in order for the order itself to come to claim its throne as it always does. Since lust is what keeps the romance alive at the core, without its presence, it becomes either platonic or pseudo-platonic (Platonic being one without many internal feelings or sexual desires in put; pseudo-platonic being the mix of both logical, internal and sexual, however with an absence of common desires.).

It may not seem like the best maze to step on, but it’s a form of suffering we must all endure in our lives, whether we like it or not. With that being stated, it’s also mandatory to keep a keen sight for the veil that’s worn by the desires themselves, for their allegory is but another obstacle for our unconscious to get through.

P.S. I oblige everyone to not take any of these words into their heads and fondle on with its strings. Take it lightly, but think it through. These are just mere words based on infinite comprehensions. 

Let's Take A Deep Breath

This isn't for the faintest of hearts or minds, this is just fantasy written within the faults of our own demise. It's the burden of our primal ancestors, it's the burden of the molecules that make us up and the burden of the stardust that molded together to gradually flourish life. It's our burden.

Our burden stands right in front of what we ought to proceed, it's like taking a ride from one end of the galaxy- wishing to kickback and enjoy,  to settling on some random planet with glamorous beauty of life, one beautiful enough to attract and invite our dopamine due to its uncommon and rare flavour. Our instincts were built so to do so, in order to keep the survival of our species. It's our burden to procreate and spread our agenda and influence all over the matrix.

This isn't just beauty, but also a sin.

For some, it may be the most beautiful of all arts that they'll ever experience; however, to some it's just not the way to go, it's just not ever about settling, it's all about exploring widely and freely without any restraint and settlement of responsibilities. It really astonished me when I was growing up, I've always held quite the opposition to settlements itself and still do. I never comprehended why people forsook their beautiful childhood behind in order to settle in for adulthood where they knew that fun would be out of the question- not to stereotype the thing in general, but that's how it seems.
As soon as the flower blooms, its objective isn't to stop blooming, it's to keep blooming until it withers away and joins back with its cosmic neighbors.

Life is fun, life is an experience, life is that one dream where we finally got to feel how it feels to be alive, yet failed to realise that there wasn't supposed to be any purpose or goals in this dream. We all made it up, because we wanted to feel like we were going somewhere trying to be satisfied. I guess we never tried to be happy even once, we don't even know what happiness is. Happiness is our constructed way of being partially satisfied, after all. It really doesn't exist at the point we delve. It only comes when we know how to love, and in order to love, we cease ourselves of our conservation of playing our norms. It'll still sound like quite the madman's imagination and since it's so even now, it's really up to us to move forward however we can. No one can force anyone to change anyone else's minds, it's really up to us, it's really dependent on how conscious we are willing to be or not. The secret teachings of all ages isn't just handed down to everyone, we got to work our way up to it, and that's when we'll realise that the secret was right next to us all our lives. Our demeanor isn't what'll dictate the future, it's our willingness to be conscious about our situation as a whole or not. 

Where I'm standing at right now, in my late teens, I'm still perplexed. I've indeed been struggling with it a lot and resisting it is not the best thing in the entire world, but it actually does serve an advantageous consequence in the long run. Albeit, I do intend to keep going this way, there might be a certain point where the primordial instinct may fire up with its maximum potential and that's the point where my radar should be clear of all opportunities, otherwise disasters might be headed towards my way. I still wish to remain the curious child I was with continuous fantasies about the life in general, that was true happiness and the major growth spurt that everyone should probably have again.

The age where we stop dreaming is the age when we turn into full-bound adults.

Adulthood is the point where we learn about our dreams, and curiosities and explore them further no matter the bounds or whatever they may be.

Why Having No Purpose Or Meaning In Life Isn't So Bad.

Again, I come forth with a very controversial topic because I, myself have been living through such a time or phase myself. Nihilism may not be appreciated or understood by everyone, but it can be categorised to be on the same edge as Zen Buddhism. Maybe not fully, but it has some correlations.

None of them require as much eloquence as they do with the mind. That's their primary focus, and that's where it all begins and concludes.

Often mistaken by Hitler's deeds, the ideologies over time has been secluded as a stereotype, passed down to the western society of scapegoats. It may just be a lesson for every person that a philosopher's sayings can't ever carry the burden of the comprehension of another perceiver, for it's up to the perceiver and their comprehension that leads their senses to a whole new road of their own ideology. Not everyone's alike, but correlatively we all are interconnected in our intellect and emotions.

From my own perspective, I think nihilism itself isn't really about to stop caring about the joy or beauty of life and the cosmos, but more so to not take anything seriously at all. That's just about it.

Don't Label.
Don't Divide. 
Don't Take Anything Seriously. 
Let It Be. 
Know That There Is No Truth. 
There's Only Our Hallucinations Of What We Sense Life To Be.
But, Just Enjoy The Ride ;) ! (Bill Hicks :D) 

(Okay, watch this TED Talk regarding Neuroscience, specifically about how our brain hallucinates.) 

It's kind of like how we just die for a while, but then we wake up from the dream we were dreaming, and now suddenly we just come to know that it was just a funny ride. A funny ride consisting of suffering, joy, agony, sorrow and all other kinds of emotions. You just start to think about the origin of your curiosity and the whole epistemological purpose behind, but then you blink your eye, look in the mirror and just wander off again being yet another person in your imagination trying to perfect out a certain scenario.
But, now you know that you don't have to be lost in that anymore, you have the freedom to let go of all the pain and curiosity itself. You don't even have to be obliged to find meaning within the observed world, because you already have found the peace you've become aware of. Thus, this transition to 'no-thingness' breaks the barrier and brings out our awareness in the wilderness.

It's funny how Soren Kierkegaard says:

"Life is not a problem to be solved, but a reality to be experienced."


Because, most of our lives we do dwell in curiosity and thought way too much, and honestly, I think that's okay, but also a bit foolish for us. On one end, we think too much and intoxicate our mind and on the other hand, we're constantly keeping a game of faith, belief and survival constructed within our lifestyle, instead of just enjoying the experience, and being engage with the play that is the dance of the cosmos. 
We're too busy learning a broad variation of newly discovered anomalies(actually, this one of the main exceptions), too busy finding a job, too busy trying to take sides within our world, too busy showing any sort of empathy, too busy to value the imagination of a moment, just too busy taking everything way too seriously, and voila! We have depression and anxiety, and now we're chasing after a cure, so that we can continue being busy again, but not thinking about the root cause of it. The biggest issue in a civilisation will always be an authority who fails to interpret, but succeeds in dictating facts that blatantly possess subjective opinion and meaning.
And Like Friedrich Nietzsche said:

"There are no facts, only interpretations." 

Good day !

P.S. I'd just like for all of you to know that all of this solely for the purpose of education and entertainment, and all the words engraved into this post are subject to interpretation, and doesn't have to stand its meaning in absolution. 

My First Book

Today's post is going to be unlike most of the my other posts, but summed up in a nutshell.
What do I mean by that ?

It's just a bunch of jumbles jiggling all the way in the form of water right in the jug.
Anyways, figurative languages aside, I've published my very first book on Amazon.

It might not be the best thing out there, but if you do feel as if you need some resonance with a bunch of encoded words that describe the depth of your inner meaning, or just want to look at someone else's deep contemplations, then you've probably come to the right place.

Ladies and Gentlemen- & Of course , energies around the universe.

I present to you,

My first ever book, and I've decided to call it :

Epistemological Mysticism

It's going to run as a series of books which will contain poetry and sometimes, some brief contemplations of mine. 

The link to product will be entailed onto the cover of the book below. 

Be sure to leave your thoughts, impressions and opinions on the comment section below. 

P.S. You've all my gratitude for making this possible, and of course the age itself :P. None of this would have come to existence without the experiences that have passed by. 

A Journey For Aeons

Start here, start there,
Welcome to the plain of existence,
Welcome to what we call the 'real world',
This real world,
a world of shatters and scammers,
scammers full of thoughts,
shatters full of blocks,
none of this is brought,
without the catalyst of the dawdling bird,
can this be another jack out of jill ?
or will this be just another hill of still ?
wow indeed.

stillness, that day on the hill,
we brought a will,
the will to not kill,
but to frail and jill,
jill my jill,
in a thrill,
you were bill of the nile,
a nile it sought,
within the vastness of thought,

this thought so vast,
why is it so ?
can't it be home,
on my own dome?
but it's all just lost,
within the bubbles,
representing you and I,
why is it lost ?
not to be thought.

this may be so it on the parallel,
But nothing comes out after this point of Tree   

What Fallacy ?

Yes, I write such yielding ludicrous tangent, 
Whether it’s for the depth of meaning, 
Or extreme sophistry, 
The natural meaning of wisdom will only go as,
Farther decay and decay. 

Extremity suffices only the claim of the attitude of a sheep, 
In the minds of none does it produce a dopamine so sweet, 
That the ripe fruit itself explodes of sweetness and into agony. 

Make me pragmatic in your blindfold, 
Making me yield is like making a toad scream ‘roar’ ! 
Which one do you expect me to adhere to ?
 Oh, such a fallacy, you’ll never see. 

-Othello D. Gomes 

Uncursed Blessing

Is this all that I will ever get into mellow ?
Answered, mystical, yet never shallow,
I liked the beams that shot me through the eyes,
It made me feel like a star.
Rippling boundaries,
Carrying non-existent burdens,
Feels like tomorrow won’t bring me present,
It’s like the unchaining of a sparrow.
This void brings me sorrow,
But I know it eliminates narrow.

-Othello D. Gomes

".............."

Is this how you look at it ?
The form of possessing no bit,
Yet it holds the slap of grit.
A formless corruption that endorses a mole,
Has no substance but empty station.
Is this how you want to grab a hold of what's being a norm ?
A Presumption that I might not have anyone doubt,
Can successively judge its own sentimental plea.

- Othello D. Gomes

Kultic Vision

My journey is ending,
I know its phase as I’m ascending,
I descended before all of this occurred,
Having the purpose of tranquility,
Yet living in duality,
Hasn’t stopped me from reaching my potential.

Harm the peacock,
Take away its cover,
Shine it in lava,
Can you see its raw bare void now?
It’s as you know now,
The colors it reflects aren’t old or new,
It’s just your reflection that makes it skewed,
If it’s a white room,
Tell me about it,
But if it’s a black room,
I know you won’t.

What do those rooms even mean?
You can tell me about the aesthetic it has,
And the seven folded designs that it has been designed into,
However a position of duality won’t solve the anomaly.

If you’re asking me what’s it like there,
All I can tell is that:
I’ve been there a couple of times,
And I will again,
But, that’s not how you’ll know what’s it like,
I know because I’ve experienced it,
I’ve lived again to tell it,
The rest is for you to discover yourself,
However, don’t give into deception. 

-Othello D. Gomes